Healing from Hell
I don’t believe in hell anymore, but I’m still afraid of it.
Why can’t I get over it?
Anxiety about hell is a common struggle while healing from religion.
Even after letting go of the belief itself, the fear can persist in the body and mind.
Why is hell anxiety common?
🧠 Fear imprints deeply in the brain.
Psychologists have found that fear-based experiences (or ideas) are encoded more strongly in memory. It’s a survival mechanism — your brain wants to remember what was dangerous. For example, if you saw a tiger in the forest, your brain would store every detail of that scene. Teachings about hell are filled with vivid, violent imagery — the kind the brain categorizes as “never forget this.”
💭 The brain responds to imagination as if it’s real.
Visualizing a beach can calm your body; imagining flames and punishment can activate your stress response. The nervous system reacts as if the danger is actually happening, especially for people with vivid imaginations or sensitive nervous systems.
⏲ Early learning sticks harder.
When hell imagery is taught in childhood, it becomes wired in during a sensitive stage of brain development. Childhood messages are emotionally charged and can persist well into adulthood, even after your beliefs have changed.
What can help?
1. Learn the history of hell
No, really — study it. Understanding how the concept of hell evolved across cultures and centuries helps shift the narrative from “this is the absolute truth” to “this is a human idea that’s changed over time.” Knowledge creates psychological distance.
2. Stop fighting the thoughts
When scary thoughts arise, the instinct is to push them away — but avoidance actually strengthens anxiety. Instead, experiment with allowing the thoughts to exist while observing them from a safe distance. Notice: “There’s that old fear showing up again.” Awareness is the first step toward loosening its grip.
3. Reframe and relabel
When the “hell tape” starts playing, try saying: “Oh, there it is again — the old message.”
Think of it like an outdated radio station your brain still tunes into by habit. You can acknowledge it without engaging.
4. Reparent with compassion
Picture yourself at the age you first learned about hell. Imagine gently explaining to that younger version that not all adults had the full story. You can write a letter to that child within you, offering reassurance and updated information from the caring adult you are now.
5. Tune in to your body
Fear isn’t just mental — it shows up in the body through a racing heart, tense muscles, or shallow breathing. Notice those cues and gently guide your body back to safety. Slow, deep breaths, grounding exercises, or soothing touch can tell your nervous system, “I’m safe right now.” (See our post on calming your nervous system for more tips.)
6. Connect with like-minded others
Hell-based teachings are often reinforced in closed communities where everyone believes the same way. These echo chambers can make old fears feel “universally true.” Exposing yourself to new circles — friends, groups, or online communities — where others share your current perspective helps loosen that grip. Hearing different voices and finding belonging in a new, supportive environment can powerfully counteract the old conditioning.
7. Externalize the fear
Get the thoughts out of your head. Journal, draw, move, or create — anything that gives form to the fear can help you see it more clearly and process it more safely.
When to seek extra support
Some people work through these fears gradually on their own. Others benefit from professional help, especially if the fear feels overwhelming or constant. A therapist trained in religious trauma or anxiety can offer tools, grounding skills, and perspective for the journey ahead.
Visit our [resources page] to find guidance for choosing a mental health professional.